Out of the question!

The first Blossie @work! book…coming in February 2021!

Questions shape our thoughts and actions because our brains immediately begin to think of answers to any question we’re asked.

With this kind of power, we need to be exquisitely careful about the questions we ask. When these questions are negative and uninspiring…

  1. “Why does this always have to happen?”
  2. “Why is business so heartless?”
  3. “Why can’t they just leave well enough alone?”
  4. “Can’t they just stop demanding so much from me?”
  5. “Why doesn’t he just do it himself?”

…our minds are on the lookout for answers: “You know why this always happens?  Because no one really cares” or “Because business is always just about the money.”

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We are already brave

Yes Changes Everything!“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow.’”

— Mary Anne Radmacher, Artist

 

We think of courage as something we have or don’t have. “I just don’t have the courage” or “I’m just not brave” or “[He/she/they] are just braver than I am.”

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Real life magic

Coming Soon! The very first Blossie@work book!

“Hey, I’m not totally perfect,” my friend Gia likes to say. “I’ve got this little chip in my tooth right here.”

LOL, but seriously, aren’t we all a little like this: always pushing ourselves, expecting perfection? And when we don’t get it (it’s easy to find a tiny “chip” in even our greatest victories), we’re so busy stressing over the small imperfection that we forget to celebrate the success.

Or we think that ignoring our successes and sprinting ahead to the next challenge makes us more “serious” about our goals.

Or we’re too worried about losing our edge to stop and give ourselves a well-deserved pat on the back.

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Great experiences don’t always feel great

Yes Changes Everything!January 15, 2009

Shortly after takeoff, US Airways Flight 1549 loses power in both engines. In what aviators call a “bird strike,” a flock of geese flying straight into the plane’s propellers has disabled them instantly.

In the cockpit, Captain Sully Sullenberger quickly realizes it would be impossible to reach any airport, meaning a crash landing is his only option. Drawing on 42 years of aviation experience, he steers the plane — a giant jetliner called and Airbus — into the Hudson River, gliding to a safe landing that spares the lives of 155 passengers and crew members.

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Love changes us

Happy October, beautiful someone!

A long time ago, I was taking a fitness class in New York City. It was early morning, a Saturday in the middle of winter. I was going through a seriously bad patch — my husband had decided he was done with marriage. This was a shock, and I hurt everywhere. I remember thinking, “Now I know I have a soul because I can feel it tearing in half.”

I’ve never been good at hiding my feelings, so I’m sure I looked pretty bad. Anyway, after class the instructor walked over to me, put an arm around my shoulder and squeezed tight. Then she turned to me. “I don’t know what you’re going through, but you’re going to be okay,” she said. After all the yelling at home, I think my knees must have given way a little at the gentleness in her voice.

“I want to give you something,” she said.

She reached into her pocket and took out $100 bill which she pressed into my hand.

“This is for you—and only for you,” she said. “Do something nice for yourself with it.”

Before I could say anything, she gave me a hug and walked away.

I watched her, my mouth hanging open, the money in my hand.

I still remember

Everything at home moved fast after that, and I never ended up going back to that studio. Still, divorce, meeting the love of my life, remarriage and two babies later, I remember that day so vividly. It was a moment when I experienced pure love — someone understanding that I was in pain and, like an angel, being inexplicably generous to me, expecting absolutely nothing in return.

I like to think that experience did more than just make an impression on me. It changed the way I thought about love and generosity. It was so powerful that it made me want to do more than just receive love. It made me want to pass love on by looking for chances to be generous in small and big ways.

Let love change us

And reading this story, maybe you do too, beautiful someone? Maybe together we can follow my angel instructor’s example by giving financially when we can, but also by letting a car in on the highway. Smiling at that annoying guy at CVS. Letting the harried mom with two small kids go ahead of us in line at the store. Telling the waiter who brought the wrong drink that it’s “totally no big deal.” Dropping a few extra groceries off at the food pantry. Raking an elderly neighbor’s leaves.

And remembering that love, in itself, doesn’t change things.

Love changes us, and we change things.