Let’s misbehave today

Please enjoy this excerpt of
Braving It: The gentle art of living boldly
…coming this month!

It’s always amazing to hear about people who brave their lives naturally, effortlessly. I can’t help but wonder what combination of biology and experiences enables them to be true to themselves, regardless of who they’re with or the situation they’re in. To have the courage of their own truth, to listen and live by their inner voice, often in spite of some of the loudest and most insistent voices shouting around them — this amazes me.

If you don’t know the name Isadora Duncan, it’s worth Googling her. Read More

Permission to be ourselves

Please enjoy this excerpt of
Braving It: The gentle art of living boldly
…coming in June!

 

At the time the idea for Braving It was taking shape in my mind, fueled (as all Blossie’s books are in one way or another J) by my own heartfelt experiences and those of the people I love, an amazing book crossed my path: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying. Written by Bronnie Ware as a series of reflections on her time providing palliative care in people’s final days, this amazing book traces the many ways in which Bronnie herself was transformed by the gift of getting to know these people at this time in their lives.

Especially striking is the number one regret Bronnie heard people share: “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” Sitting with that for a moment is nothing less than earth-shattering. Read More

From worries to puppies and rainbows

Yes Changes Everything!Happy February, beautiful someone! Please enjoy this excerpt from Yes Changes Everything!

 

We’re going to worry. It’s just part of being alive and involved in life — in a relationship, career, house, body, family — there’s a lot to worry about. But what if we thought about it this way:

It’s not worth worrying about things we can change because we can take action to change them. We can do things to influence them to move in the direction we want them to go. So instead of worrying, we can simply take action and know that we’re doing everything we can to move these things in a good direction.

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When we wobble, we grow!

…from my next book, Yes Changes Everything! Coming in May 2020!

“You’ve got to sing like you don’t need the money,
Love like you’ll never get hurt;
You’ve got to dance like nobody’s watchin’
It’s gotta come from the heart if you want it to work.”

These are lyrics from the song, “Come from the Heart” by Susanna Clark and Richard Leigh. I love them! They help me relax my grip on whatever I’m trying to do and ditch the illusion of ever being perfect at it (…and *exhale*).

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Who are your sandpaper people?

We’ve all got our own sandpaper people. These are the family members, neighbors, and coworkers who test our patience, demand more from us than we’re willing to give, or just generally make us crazy.

Be grateful for them, beautiful someone! Honestly, their abrasive behavior is smoothing out our own rough edges and sharpening our dull ones.

  • If you’re super-restless and impatient, having to deal with people who run at a slower pace smooths out that impulsive edge on you.
  • If you’re a laid back, wait-and-see type person surrounded by an army of Type As at work, your own (overly?) relaxed approach to work is being energized as you keep pace with these people.
  • If you’re kind of emotional, being around people who are always calm may make you crazy, but it will also stop the freight train of feelings and impulses that can drag you all over the place.
  • If you’re a loner, friends who force you to go out are opening up your network, your mind, maybe even your world.
  • People who disagree with us make us think.
  • People whose values or beliefs differ from ours teach us tolerance, respect…or spiritual detachment as we learn to “live and let live.”

Our sandpaper people are making us try new things, think in new says, get exposed to new ideas and people, witness our own strength, and see ourselves with new potential.

Smarter and stronger

This is all preparation for your dream come true. In fact, sandpaper people are pretty much needed for progress. Every time an edge on us gets sanded down, every time a dull spot in our lives—something in need of polishing up—gets “buffed” by a sandpaper person, we’re getting wiser and more patient. We’re broadening our perspective and our horizons. We’re seeing things in new ways and thinking about them with a different perspective.

And I know it’s hard to believe it when it’s happening to us, but those sandpaper people—even the incredibly annoying ones—are lifting us to new heights, making us better at listening, building our patience, and strengthening our resolve to reach our dream come true…all in ways no other type of experience could. Every time they knock us off course or distract us or generally irritate us, we have to do the work to get back on track.

Again, even though we may not like it when it’s happening, this is all making us smarter and stronger. We don’t grow in the good times. Our growth spurts come through tough times, through adversity.

And sandpaper people = adversity.

Big time.

Fresh ideas

I asked some friends what they learned from the sandpaper people in their lives. Listen to a few:

  • “My last boss was such a bad manager, but I had to learn to work for her without going out of my mind. So I did. Today, I could totally work for anyone. Thanks to her, I have tons more patience and self-control. And it takes a lot to get me upset at work. No one could ever be as bad a manager as she was, and I survived. I can handle anything now.”
  • “I treat my friends really well because I’ve lived through some seriously bad situations with friends. I learned the hard way just how important love and loyalty really are.”
  • “I finally figured out what my grandmother meant when she said, ‘Smooth mountains give you nothing to grip onto as you climb.’ Definitely true, I don’t grow when everyone in my life is making things easy for me.”

Instead of seeing sandpaper people as just plain annoying, try to look at them as a growth spurt in the making, a chance to learn something really important and see new potential in yourself. Remember this especially when they make you want to scream. That’s a huge leap forward straight in the direction of your dream come true.