Ever feel like the demands on your time are just endless?
Please enjoy this important excerpt from The Gift of No!
Compare what I call a “naked no,” a no without an explanation (a simple “I’m not available” or “I can’t make it” for example) with the too much information (TMI) version of the same statement: “I won’t be able to go because I have a fitting for the dress I’m wearing to my brother’s wedding.”
Beautiful someone, in the first case, no means no. Not much to talk about because the naked no doesn’t leave the door open for discussion or give someone information they can use to take down our boundary.
In the TMI version, we’ve practically invited the person to say, “The fitting’s on Thursday? That’s three days away! You have plenty of time to move the appointment and help me instead!” or “Those appointments are easy to change. All you have to do is call them. They’re very flexible!” or “A fitting? That’s why you can’t make it? Seriously?”
The first Blossie @work! book…coming in February 2021!
Questions shape our thoughts and actions because our brains immediately begin to think of answers to any question we’re asked.
With this kind of power, we need to be exquisitely careful about the questions we ask. When these questions are negative and uninspiring…
- “Why does this always have to happen?”
- “Why is business so heartless?”
- “Why can’t they just leave well enough alone?”
- “Can’t they just stop demanding so much from me?”
- “Why doesn’t he just do it himself?”
…our minds are on the lookout for answers: “You know why this always happens? Because no one really cares” or “Because business is always just about the money.”
Hi Beautiful Someone,
Sorry for the long post, but I really wanted to share this excerpt from my new book, Yes Changes Everything! Please enjoy, and let me know what you think!
What do you know about Helen Keller? Probably that she was blind and deaf and lived a long and influential life. Me too. But it was only after coming across one of my favorite Helen Keller quotes on optimism that I started to look closer at her life and realize how truly remarkable she was.
Helen Keller was born a healthy baby in 1880 on a farm near Tuscumbia, Alabama. At six months, she began to talk and at 12 months to walk. Before age 2, however, an illness — later they would speculate scarlet fever or meningitis — had taken Helen’s ability to see and hear. She would live in darkness and silence for the rest of her life.
For decades, running the mile in less than four minutes was considered impossible, beyond the physical capacity of the human body. Then one day in 1954 on the Iffley Road track in Oxford, England, something incredible happened: in front of 3,000 spectators, a 25-year-old medical student named Roger Bannister ran a mile in 3 minutes and 59.4 seconds.
More amazing than the achievement itself was what happened afterward. Though forever, runners had tried without success to break the four-minute mile, within a few weeks, the record was broken again. In a few years, the mile had been run in less than four minutes hundreds of times. Today, the record stands at just over 3 minutes and 43 seconds.
I always feel sorry for lottery winners or people who have inherited great wealth — I really do — because without the financial and professional challenges and yes, struggles of life, they are more prone to depression. They feel weak because their spiritual and intellectual muscles aren’t facing the resistance they need to get strong. They’re often scared and maybe defensive because their guts aren’t being tested, and they don’t have confidence in how they’d react if they were. They haven’t had the joy of seeing themselves rise to new challenges.
It’s just impossible to underestimate the incredible importance of meaningful work and life challenges and experiences.