Paying it forward

Enjoy this excerpt from Simply Irresistible, this month’s featured title!

No matter what industry they’re in or what job they do, irresistible people know how to do two things:

— Tune into the needs of others.

— Pay it forward, by generously giving others their time, energy, and ideas.

They’re positive, constructive, and encouraging, and help out whenever they can, plus—and this is important—they expect nothing in return. They don’t do all this hoping to get something back for it.

Then, guess what?  When they’re in need, all those people they’ve helped show up with offers of ideas and support. Not every time and often not right away, but on the whole over time, that’s exactly what happens. People found they could rely on them. Now they’re ready to return the favor.

This is why, if we want people to be interested in our opinion, we need to ask for theirs first.

If we want them to listen to our great ideas, we need to listen to theirs first.

If we want them to call us when the best opportunities come up, we need to send a few their way first.

If we want them to connect us with an influential person, we need to introduce them to a few of our favorite people first.

Let’s get more specific

Want them to promote us? We need to make them look good.

Give us a job? We need to do some intense homework and show them what we’ll do for them when we get the position.

Buy our product or service? We need to offer them something of value at low or no cost first.

When we make these regular practices in our own lives, one day, we’ll look around and realize…

We’re surrounded by people who think like us:  colleagues, mentors, friends, and coworkers who are generous and concerned.

Since we value their thinking and their positive, breakthrough-bound approach to work, they’re our go-to people when we need a new idea or fresh solution…and we’re theirs. They’re having lunch with someone we’ve been thinking we’d like to meet. They’re making a presentation at the networking event we’re attending. They’re introducing us to influential people, letting us know about exciting new opportunities, and telling us about resources that will help us.

Healthy and hopeful

Because we are high impact, high value colleagues, we make people feel healthy and hopeful. They seek out our company and freely share their ideas with us, confident that we’ll find even the smallest grain of positive potential and help them expand on it.

Since we’re on their minds so often, we’re the one they think of when a great opportunity pops up. The one they want to introduce to the influential decisionmaker. The person they can’t help but help.

The best experiences, people, and opportunities start to show up for us, the struggle to be noticed and respected ends. Surrounded by positive energy and mutual support, we enjoy your work so much more.

Amazingly, by helping others win, we win.

By putting them first, we end up ahead.

Better than perfect

Enjoy this excerpt from You Know What I Should Have Said?, this month’s featured title!

A long time ago, I think I must have been 9 years old, I overheard someone describing a piece of music. “It’s not beautiful,” she said in a tone that made it clear this was not a compliment. “It’s perfect, but it has no heart. So perfect, just not beautiful.”

For some reason, this stuck with me, and I think about it all these years later. That a piece of music (or anything or anyone) can seem perfect, but lack something that makes it fall short of beautiful. That there are important differences between perfection and true beauty that make striving for perfection not worth it.

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YES changes everything!

Yes Changes Everything!Please enjoy this excerpt from
the opening of Yes Changes Everything!

There is this amazing story about the day John Lennon and Yoko Ono met: in the Fall of 1966, Yoko was in London for an art exhibition. Already an accomplished avant-garde artist, Yoko was displaying her works at the Indica Gallery as part of an exhibition called Unfinished Paintings and Objects.

John visited the gallery the day before the show was scheduled to open. He was skeptical about the displays, and the artist herself, who greeted him with a card that read, literally, “Breathe.”

One piece got his attention, though…

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Let’s see what we think

Please enjoy this excerpt from the Introduction to The Becoming Journal!

There’s something really wonderful about putting our thoughts on paper where we can see them. Writing slows us down and gives us time to think. Intuition and random thoughts start joining into vivid pictures until all of a sudden, we see new connections, aha’s!, and fresh ideas.

Kind of like turning a sweater inside out so we can finally see the tag that’s been itching us, putting a vague idea that’s been drifting around in our heads down on paper gets it out where we can see it. In the light of day, it may look amazing; it may not. Either way, writing it down gives us power over what happens next.

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Dream your dream

Your dreams are one of the truest parts of you.

To have the energy and passion you need for any dream, it’s got to be first and foremost about what you want to bring into your life. It’s easy to get distracted by what other people think, even people we love and care about, or even by what the headlines say.

We tend to listen too hard to other people’s ideas about what we should and shouldn’t try or what we’re good at or how we should spend our time and lives. We take the headlines too seriously and immediately apply them to ourselves, when they don’t.

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